About the time I was annoying math teachers with Apple ]['s, I was also realising my dreams as a burgeoning writer. I showed some of my literary spewings-forth to some of my friends, who showed it to some of their lesser-known friends, who showed it to some even more obscure folks; this generated what you are about to read. Or not. The Slosh is split into sections, nominally entitled 'chapters'. They include 1, 2, 3, 17, 37 (VGA Graphics Version), size nine, and a whole pile of extruded aluminum slats. Frake Jon tong sna sna sna LeVar Burton. DENISE CROSBY! Not stills gnash.

[Do you realize that Ode To What I Think When I Think has initials of OTWITWIT - which could be O Twit Wit, like hey, wow, that's a greeting for a dumbhead like somebody I know. Who it is I'm not sure but I must know some dumbheads. Oh I know. That Emu fellow - he's sorta odd ain't he? Wears Cadet Zippo shades and the whole thing. Must be him. Put a burning cross on his lawn. Anyway, Emu Twit-Wit Petwurt Pervert weirdisms.]

[You might also notice that long-winded bombasticity malapropisms inherent in Twit-Wit these slight interruptions which occur when I cannot think of anything to write so I switch and think for awhile while not actually thinking about what I am typing and just saying things and writing in my head what I am about to do in - hey! Pump you up!]

And now for something compltely similar: Twit-wit. Now you may think that I am strange. This is true. Now you may think that I drink a lot of Coke. This is true. You may think that I don't really know what the fuck is going on. This is true. You may think that I am getting bored again (this is true) but you know what that means... AF will write again. I am writing from the dead? How about rising from the bread? Or dying from the writes more likely. Have you had your wrights red two u?

[Peanuts. Peanuts. Peanuts. Peanuts. Don't want to know about the (fish- phlegm) you're making - don't want to know about the (fish-phlegm) you're taking.... peanuts! peanuts / peanuts / peanuts

Ow, use a pun and go to grison. And now, AF will vomit telekinetically and surprise you. Sketch please draw bridge.

A man in a grey suit whispers, "I'm calling"; pack up and drive away.

We live in an ever-changing world. One of Televideos and Wysi; of meatburgers and televisions; of sex and violins. Whatever.

So like, if my feet are wider than your feet and your feet are wider than my feet, how many feet does Mr. D-------- have? Or how much feces does the average blue whale donate to his favorite charity in one Venusian year? This is highly indicative of roughly nothing at all. If your name is Christine, are you really that weird? AAAAAAAAAAAGGH! If you have a snee, and I have a snee, do we have to sneeze? Hoo boy, what fun are puns.

Pee nuts. Free butts. Good sex and damn! she is sexy and I love her. Which is but is not what I said before. Just a little snack on the side... DEATH MUST ENSUE!

And what logarithms are poems. What? AF are you feeling okay? AF? Yoohoo are you there Mr. Parrot (he's resting) wap wap wap (he's stunned) he's dead (wrestling) shuffled off this mortal coil (forum) gone to meet his maker (playboy) passed away (fred) dead (nurse!) HE IS NO MORE! says John Cleese. DOCTOR DOCTOR DOCTOR MY BRAIN HURTS. WELL WE'LL HAVE TO HAVE IT OUT THEN. NO DOCTOR THE BRAIN IN MY HEAD NOT THE ONE IN MY KNEE. OH THAT ONE. WELL LET'S GO. NURSE NURSE NURSE NURSE OH! YOU SCARED ME. SAW. FISH. WHALE. Potatoes and SpudBoys Bru ha ha ha ha ha ha Bru ha ha ha ha ha ha.

You know, this fuckin thing is long.

HMMMMMMmmmmMMmmmMmmmmMmMMmMmmMMmmMMmMmMMMmmMfmmM.

It's over now. Which was to say then and not now due to frog noses - Hey wow, Mr. D ------, con quien te acuestas? Okay but that wasn't supposed to make sense. Where do I go from here to a better state than this? Well, don't be blind to the big surprise swimming round and round like the deadly hands of the radium clock at the bottom of the blue. Look, it's not my fault if that didn't either (make sense) cause that's what the guy said, I think. Anyway it's a great song, go out and buy it. But remember that that mini-LP has a remixed front-side from album 2 but rerecorded back-side from album 1. They calim they were only remixed - I think they are out-takes or shortened versions or something.... Mesopotamia! Get out of that state you're living in your own PRIVATE IDAHO! And now for something completely nonUkranian. But Chris Blackwell produced their records so this must mean something ' = REM.

It's worked so far, but we're not out yet.

What is about blondes that irritate me so? The only way to be wanted (at least a little) is to be rude (not too rude) to drive them away so they want it... but don't if you try to get them to admit it. I thought it was just that Catholics teach good girls to tease without giving... but Southern Baptists too? JTB!

NASAL SEX UPDATE - Uuughhh blort snarf phlegm not (well, you know, that stuff) 30 days to better root canal sex.....

In every revolution, there is one man with a peanut.

Gone are the greenscreens, the huge power supplies from hell, the objects identfying a wasted, hopeless past.

Now seen is clean, nominally tidy; though not the shining EmuSound of a yuppie future, organized, and so unlike MQE. More like HSC. Or WSW. Or WS 3.3 Professional kumquat dick.

Or EmuLabs. Next week on Body Parts And You!

Miss W. Enright of Northampton, Lodi or thereabouts has the following to contribute:

DEEP THOUGHTS.

To write, is to find your own pen, through the ink of the person sitting next to you, but when the person leaves to go to the john, then you've lost your pen. It is said I have a pen, but my pen has no ink. Hence my long hours of Hallmark haunting, trying to find some ink and turn my pen into a sumpremer [yo!] writing utensil. But there was my pencil sitting in my desk, and it sank into my paper, at last bringing weird drawings to life. Oh ye pens who have made me crazed and rather loony, from pencils and paper, eternal doodles.

Respectfully submitted,

W. Enright

Weird doodler at large.

Follwing this most (well, something good anyway) prose is a picture of a round stick figure (if such can be imagined) which I cannot possibly reproduce on paper (with a computer anyway). Somehow I will, but, my apologies, Miss W.E., your most illustrious of illustrations shall have to wait for me to figure out what to do. In time!

Thankyoo Miss Enright. Really. That might make a bright awakening intro to this otherwise dark, gloomy and generally downbeat piece of sodden negetivism. On that note I will further explicate.

Trick is, to have a car you gotta have a job; and to have a job you gotta have a car. CATCH FUCKIN 22! And you gotta shave yer fuckin beard. Miss W.E. donno whattiz like to lose so much facial hair (I hope not anyway. Dammit, I'm fairly sure. And don't call me surely/Shirley!) So anyway, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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Aagh.

Why scribble when you can just... type? Justypit. EmuComp. Whaevah.

Bitch. Hit the bitch. Hit the bitch with a pitchfork. Whack the bitch on the head with the pitchfork. Watch her bleed. It's all okay, it's all good. It's the natural way of things. Weddings sure as hell aren't. Watch her bleed to death. You've just killed the bitch with the bitchfork. Doesn't it feel good?

Red plastik parts bins are boxified in fruitcrates underbed. Paperwork must be sorted thru and stored... desk behind stereo and thereabouts? Whynot. Empties. Laundry. Permanency. *H2O CompuPro* will need separation from plants... and water. Tank is no big deal... but leaks MUST be prevented. Plants should be Below the tank too so as to allow for gravity to work for & not against. Hmm, work. Spare bits... hard-drives, boards, etc. Christ there's a bunch of RAM16's in the other room... Where the hell do they go? Quinn! Disks? At least the flowers found a home, albeit not a perfect one. Closetify spare E3 KB etc. Jesus! Another goddam BETA! AARGH. Beta can be closeted when SL5K worx again. NEC is there too... There is space next to the rax. There are boogers in my noze. So?

Who said MQE? Bullfrog anyone.

So Quinn's now sells these .66 Amp fans (turbines) which are primarily used by the U.S. Navy, but can double as a heat sink. I think it must be mounted on the RCIT (Remote Counter-Intelligence Terminal) also known as a 13.8 V C- 128 D. Interesting device.

1. In Vietnam, :

• A. He was 19.
  
• B. Rice is the chief fishing product.
  
• C. Swimming is prohibited.
  
• D. It is bad to annoy the taxi drivers.
  

• A. China is much larger than the Twinkie.
  
• B. China has a larger income per capita than the Twinkie.
  
• C. The Twinkie is illegal.
  
• D. There is no difference between China and the Twinkie.
  

• A. The Karlsaganic tribe of NW Territory.
  
• B. Spinach is not to be substituted for punishment.
  
• C. There is no main export of any Arctic Eskimo tribe.
  
• D. It is bad to annoy the Eskimos.
  

• A. Their pigs.
  
• B. Their wives.
  
• C. Their main export: spinach.
  
• D. Their clever recycling of polysynthetic plastics made into handbags.